AGE: 21
check myself into the infirmary at college after noticing a pink dot on my abdomen. certain this dot represented an impending and excruciating case of chicken pox, i wanted to quarantine myself. the examination went as follows:

nurse 1: have you ever had chicken pox before?
todd: yes. in 11th grade.
nurse 1: (laughs hysterically and calls nurses 2 & 3 over. repeats story to them)
nurse 2 & 3: (laugh themselves silly)
nurse 1: go home. you're fine. you can't have chicken pox twice.
me: um...ok. um, what about this dot?
nurse 1, 2 & 3: (in unison) go home!