I'm sitting in my coffee shop of choice, along with a dozen or so other cyborgs. We're all tapping away on our laptops (mac to pc ratio a demographic research boner-inducing 2:1), drinking $2-$4 cups of fair trade coffee concoctions. (i'm having a thai iced coffee that is so delicious i can't believe it doesn't have breasts) The stereo, driven by an iBook running iTunes, is playing The Rolling Stones' "Salt of the Earth." Nothing could be funnier to me.*

*Oh wait. A fat bakery deliveryman just slipped on a mess of marbles, fell on his behind, and then the banana cream pie he was delivering landed on his face. Now there's a bulldog in a tutu licking the cream off the fat guy's face. So I guess, in regards to that "nothing could be funnier" comment, I stand corrected.**

**The dog just farted on a baby. Greatest day of my life.